Topis
are a universal truth that no one can live without. Whether you are a student
or working somewhere, making false excuses is inherent part of personality
trait. I see topis not less a superhero; need to bail on friends to catch up on
sleep? Topi to the rescue! I came across a hilarious blog called topi101, which lists many popular excuses; the top 5 are listed below.
Tabiyat Kharab Hai
Although
we are a middle income country according to the United Nations, we all fall ill
so regularly that even Ethiopians would have pity on us. From corporate
employees to maids working at various homes, we are a nation of liars (me
included) who are severely ill one day and next day at work are completely
fine. It seems like we have some ‘sleeping disease’ within us, which infects us
mostly on Monday and by night goes back to the dormant state.
Internet Nai Chal Raha
In
my student life, whenever we had a deadline for an assignment or project, there
was at least one person in the group (mostly who never liked to work) whose
internet suddenly use to stop work as soon as a task was assigned to him or
her. Miraculously, the next day, internet used to work just fine. I honestly
use to think there was some, “bahruni haath ya hadoodiun ki saadish” which
never wanted them to work.
Gari
Kharab Hogai
Our
students are never at fault for getting late to class, it is their car,
possessed by a ghost, which ensures that they never reach on time. This topi is
as old as the existence of cars and has helped many students covering their
oversleeping habits. The irony is, even if in reality someone’s car breaks
down, no one now believes it really happened.
Yaar
Ammi Mana Kar Rahi Hain
As
a nation we love our mothers to bits, we are so innocent that we never disobey
them, especially if it involves bailing on a plan, which we never want to go to
in first place. If the last topi is in existence since the development of cars,
this one is there since the dawn of mankind. Whenever we are being lazy for
going to a plan or have to go to another plan secretly, our mothers jump in to
action to save the day.
Bas
Paanch Minute
Clocks
in Pakistan seem to run at different pace compared to the rest of the world.
Women like to lure men to a mall or standalone stores for shopping by saying,
“Bas paanch minute ka kaam hai”. These 5 minutes are equivalent to half an hour
to an hour of normal world timing (I am talking from experience). If you
confront them over the deceit, they fail to acknowledge the additional time
they took by innocently saying, “Paanch minute hey tu ziadah liye they”. There
should be a time converter, which can accurately predict the time a woman will
spend.
I
agree with topi101, when the blogger says “Kyun ke Topi tu tum bhi ho. Topi tu
mein bhi hon!” No matter how much we hate topis, we cannot deny we are an
integral part of the topi culture.
What is your favourite Topi of all time? Let me know in the comments!
